Perspective is Everything

I woke up this morning (since I work 2nd shift morning for me is around 11 a.m. to noon) and had several voicemails and text messages on my phone.  Text messages are easiest to check, so I get to those first.. bad news.  Real bad news.  A good friend's two daughters were in a bad wreck and had been air lifted to the hospital.

After returning all of the phone calls and texts things look pretty grim for their youngest, who is twelve.  A very sad and very shocking morning.

Add that to quite a few other things I already had weighing on my mind and I was definately ready to get out and run.  Bad as it may sound I kind of like the idea of being able to run away from my thoughts.  Except I forgot to wash my miniscule workout wardrobe last night... crap.  I found my tech tee that I wore on my last run.. it's wicking fabric I reasoned.. I didn't sweat *that* much... *sniff*  it doesn't smell.. winner!  (Hey don't judge, I'm surely not the only one who's done it).  The pants.. another story.  I put on my one pair of shorts.. you know.. the ones I refuse to wear running because of my fear of them riding up and making me look like I'm wearing some kind of wierd bikini bottom complete with horrifically chafed thighs... yeah.. those.  Thankfully I've at least lost enough weight that they didn't look half bad.. standing still.

I got the the park and today was supposed to be w5d1 - except I forgot to put that podcast on my ipod.  Oops.  Oh but I have it on my itouch, which is in my bag from work - oh.. but it's dead as a doornail.... so I did another day of week four.  Oh.. and it started to rain as soon as I started running. Crap.

Not having week five may not have been a bad thing however.  I was feeling pretty anxious about this whole week five ordeal, but completing week four in record time today boosted my confidence level so I think I'll be totally ready come Thursday. 

I think this morning during my run was the only time my brain stopped chewing itself  into goo.  It was a welcome break.  So much so I wouldn't mind going for another one when I get off work.. except that it'll be pitch dark and 3 a.m.  so maybe not.  I also am not technically supposed to do that.  I guess.

Lessons of the day:

• Do more laundry. 
• Don't let dearest do it.  I had a panic attack when I thought he might have washed my dry fit tops with softener and on high heat with an inkpen in the washer (this is pretty common and apparently happened in the load with the kakis I wore to work today). 
• Also tell people you love them.  Every chance you get - you never know when it'll be the last chance you get.

I Banish Thee!!

Banish thee demon scale!!!  *groan*

Okay so I'm almost a month in.  I was hoping for a little more than five pounds to disappear.  Yes, yes you say "oh well that's still an average of a little over a pound a week".  HOGWASH!  I lost 5 pounds the first week.  Since then the scale has not budged.  It will tease up and down within a pound.

This morning I was excited when it seemed my demon scale decided to tell me I had lost a pound.

Oh How I Lov... Loathe thee

I want a jelly donut.  And mashed potatoes.  Not together mind you... just in general.  I also want my clothes to continue to fit better.  I don't care so much about the number on the scale as how my clothes fit and how my body looks and feels.  That darn jelly donut sure would taste delicious though... *sigh*

I haven't done so well with keeping up with my calories lately.  Possibly another reason why the number on the scale hasn't changed... hum..  I did eat better today though.  I didn't eat a single candy bar from the gift shop (yesterday I think I ate two... maybe three) nor did I eat a single thing out of the vending machine, or that came out of a drive thru window.  I really could go for some chick fil-a chicken strips right now too... can you tell I'm a little bit hungry?  I'm not really.  Maybe a little.  but not really.  I don't know why I'm craving so many things and I'm not even all that hungry.

I did eat a breakfast burrito this morning (homemade) and a kiwi fruit, followed by a snack of cocoa roast almonds, a banana, a protein fruit smoothie, and the ravioli from a healthy choice dinner (sans sauce) for "lunch".  Oh and a raisin bagel.  Just the bagel, no delicious cream cheese.  Roughly 1400 calories for the day.  Not too shaby.  Now if I can just keep myself from breaking from now until the time I get home and go to bed...

Tomorrow is another run day - I've been reading some other runners' blogs and I feel like a slacker only running every other day.  I know that it's important not to push myself too hard to start out though.  I know I need recovery time, and to prevent myself from burning out... but I still feel like a slacker.  I have to keep reminding myself that I am seeing progress, even though it is slow, it's still a lot more than I've seen in the past oh.. four years or so.  After my morning run tomorrow is Sunday lunch at my brother's, he's making lasagna - then it's back to work.  I am pleased that so far I've been able to still squeeze in "runs" during my on weeks at work.  I use quotation marks around the word runs because they are still more like jog/walk/granny shuffle, but the granny in me is showing a little less now.

All of a sudden I'm rather tired.  The idea of going to the grocery store now is looking less and less apealing, especially since I now know it's been raining all night, and continues to do so.  That jelly donut isn't looking as good as my bed now.  Sadly I still have to stop and get drinks for the dearest and something for him to be able to cook for himself tomorrow night while I'm at work.  When I say something for him to cook - that means in the microwave.  Just so you know.  I'm not as good as I once was - I used to get up and cook dinner at 11 a.m. and have it ready for him to eat before I left to go to work, and before he came home.  Yeah not so much anymore.  However, he now spends more time at home than I do.  This is my justification.

Wee!  Eight more minutes and I get to go home!  Er.. to the grocery store then home!  Then to bed!  Screw you jelly donut! 



....and the mashed potatoes you rode in on.

Just five more minutes...

Aw man.. it's 11 a.m. already??  I'm not ready to get up, I need to sleep some more..  but today is run day.  Week 4 Day 2 of C25K.  Just five more minutes...

Okay, okay I'm up.  I'm even dressed.  Well, I'm still putting on my socks and shoes while I check my email and my facebook... oh Kate's in a relationship now really?  ... Just five more minutes, then really I'll get out the door.

Alright, I'm at the park.  Not too crowded yet, the only other runner looks to be leaving, let's get this thing started. I'll admit that even though this is day two of week four, I'm still pretty intimidated.  Four weeks ago I couldn't run more than 30 seconds at a time.  Five whole minutes of running?  Really?  More than once?

I keep telling myself, you can do this, you've done it before.  It's only five more minutes.  It's only five more minutes of discomfort, only a total of thirty minutes today that my legs and bum will burn, that my chest will heave, that the heat from my face will fog up my sunglasses.. only five more minutes.

I did it, one more day, five more minutes.

Until next week.  That's when things get really scary.

Time for Laundry... again?? I don't want to clean - I just want to run.

Good grief I despise laundry.  I don't mind the sorting.  I don't mind the washing, or moving them to the dryer.  I mind the folding.  I mind the putting away.  A lot.  I will avoid doing laundry until the last possible minute if I know there are clean dry clothes in the dryer that I'll have to deal with in order to get a wet load in.  I know it's time to do laundry again.. when I go to my closet and can't find a single pair of clean "grannies"

Just a Blah-ish kinda day

Okay well I made it - I actually got out of bed this morning and went for my walk/jog/shuffle and got back, showered and dressed before my dear boyfriend even knew I was gone.  I went another 2 miles this morning so that pushes me just over 1/3 of the way to my first goal, which is great.  The point behind my first goal (30 cumulative miles logged before my birthday) is to get me exercising 3 days a week.  So far so good.

Today was hard - I think it's because I tried to push myself too hard maybe?  There were lots of people my age at the park today and they were all runners.  I think I got a little bit discouraged.  My recovery periods were easier though, I wasn't wheezing and panting quite as much as I have been.  I only have one more day in week 2, and I don't know if I'll be ready to step up to week 3 or not - but I've just got to try it and see.  I've been having some knee pain, mostly when I go up and down the stairs.  At the end of my workout I did a short full out sprint and while it was much shorter in duration than my granny shuffle, it felt better.  I could feel the muscles I was using and not the pain in my knees.  I'm sure it didn't help either that I wasn't hydrated and hadn't eaten, and didn't really have any carbs for dinner the night before.. I don't think...

Blah - super tired today.  I even drank a 5hr energy drink, maximum strength and that didn't help much. 

So otherwise - not much to report for today, headed home, so I can head to bed!

Short and Sweet

Did another 2 miles this morning at the park - took Josh with me this time.  He did good, he walked after one brief jog to get a good head start on me.  It was nice out, it stormed yesterday afternoon so it was much cooler, actually almost a bit chilly.  This was w2d1 in c25k.  I finished out all the intervals, but I wasn't sure I would on some of them.  Others however, didn't seem so bad.  Probably a matter of where my brain was at the moment.

I tried out my new asics, they did well for me.  They have nice air circulation on my toes to help keep my feet cool, and have the support I need around my ankles.  My hips and knees also didn't hurt when I got done, score!  My shins however, are a bit achy.  They were like that yesterday though.. I'm hoping that's not going to be a problem.

Now it's off to work, I actually was able to huff my delivery last night and shave off a good 30 minutes.  It was a light load though.

Wondering what to do, need to take tomorrow off but I won't have time to run on Sunday what with meeting the fams for lunch, then going to work... unless I get up really early.. and I suppose I could do that since I'll have Monday off.. we'll see.

Hooked - I hope...

Okay, so I think I'm hooked now. I hope so at least. Today was only day 3 of my C25K program, but I'm loving it so far. I actually didn't use my podcast today - I met up with two of the other girls that I'm doing the 5K with and we worked out together. We wound up walking/jogging with the jogging intervals being 2 to 3 minutes long. I was stoked that I could actually run 3 minutes without stopping! Okay so maybe I was "running" like a grandma, but I'm totally okay with that.

We worked out for about 45 minutes or so and wound up going just a little over 3 miles. Mary Beth ran an extra mile, to see if she could run one mile straight without stopping.

After we finished up and made a quick stop by work (and Qudoba - SHAME I KNOW!!)

Back in the Saddle

Okay - so the battle continues. I've been losing, but I think the tides are about to turn. (You hear that stomach roll and lumpy butt??)

Thank heavens for friends.